Jive Turkey’s New Year’s Rockin’, Designated-Driverin’, Just-Sprite-for-Me-Thanks Eve!

Jesus, what is UP with this time of year and reflecting on things? First there’s Thanksgiving, where you give thanks for the good things in your life, and then there’s Christmas/December holidays where you’re inundated with family togetherness and love and shit, and then New Year’s: the time for remembering the past year and determining how you want to move forward. And God help you if you’ve ever been trapped in one of those situations where someone insists on hearing everyone’s New Year’s resolutions. That shit always makes me nervous, because my resolutions are always either 1) something kind of private that I like to keep to myself, or 2) something that sounds fantastic but inevitably turns into a massive source of guilt whenever I fail to follow through.

Can’t I volunteer at the Animal Shelter FROM HOME?

Holiday Hangover

Well, Internet, here I am. Back from the holidays. No more presents, no more waking up to parents making you breakfast, no more staying up late watching License to Drive.

What? Don’t  YOU always celebrate the holidays  with the two Coreys?

Thirty-two

Good morning, Internet. Today it is:

1. Freezing ass cold,
2. My first and last day of work this week, and
3. My mother-truckin’ birfday.

Either I’m getting really damn pregnant, or I had a little too much cake.

The World’s Fastest 31 Days

Internet, is it just me or does December go by in approximately 2 weeks? Because every year it seems I find a hole in the space-time continuum that takes me straight from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Day in what feels like 48 hours.

Before Nick Nolte started sporting his state-issued crazy DUI hair.

Because It Can’t All Be Catnaps and Nachos

I don’t know if you guys have heard, but there are actually parts of this whole pregnancy gig that are kind of tough. You got your morning sickness, your heartburn and indigestion, your lower back pain that makes you wonder if you can get that epidural 4 months in advance. And then there was yesterday, when we visited our first prospective daycare.

That’ll be $1,000/month for Tuition, with a side of Crippling Guilt.

UPDATE! I Still Hate “The Christmas Shoes” With the Intensity of A Thousand Burning Circles of Hell

I think there’s a dangerous tendency in our society to assume certain things about pregnant women. I’m not just talking about the “Ha-ha, are you craving pickles and ice cream?” comments…

And GOD HELP ME, but this looks kind of amazing right now…

Over the River and Through the Woods…

So, how was everyone’s Thanksgiving? I hope all of you enjoyed more than your fair share of starchy goodness and dishes coated in heavy cream, marshmallows, and deep fried bits of onion (or perhaps all three at once). And if you’re feeling guilty over the extra pound or two you think you may have packed on over the holiday weekend, let me assure you that no one gained as much as I did this weekend:

Seven pounds, nine ounces, to be exact.