In Other News, Somewhere a Puppy is Dying RIGHT NOW

August 14, 2007 at 10:50 am 2 comments ran a really positive, uplifting story today about the various ways your body is ravaged, butt-fucked, and bitch-slapped by aging.

I’m pretty sure this was my favorite excerpt:

“As early as age 20, people may notice the beginning signs of aging: fine wrinkles, thinning skin, loss of firmness in hands and neck, graying hair, hair loss and thinning nails. At age 30, the human body’s major organs begin to decline.” 


In other words: By the time you are old enough to figure out what the fuck you are doing with your life, your body is a wrinkled, thin-skinned, hairless, flabby-necked, weak-nailed rotting pile of ass. Enjoy!


Next stop: pissing yourself and not remembering where you live!


Entry filed under: Gobble-gobble.

Hey! You! Get Off Of My Ass! Oh, Evan Rachel Wood

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Josh  |  August 14, 2007 at 11:00 am

    By the time you realize how old you are, you’re allready dead.

  • 2. Husband of Said Turkey  |  August 14, 2007 at 11:01 am

    The lady in that picture has lost her mind and thinks his ear is a glass of fine merlot.

    “Ah, excellent year. I can smell a subtle oaky undertone with a hint of peach and… hmm… what’s this… earwax? That’s odd. Uh oh… I just made a B.M.”


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