Love Is…Never Having to Stop to Pee
So we’ve all heard of Lisa Nowak, the former astronaut who went a little apeshit over her affair with a co-worker, and tried to attack some bitch who be triflin’ with her boo. Allow me to break it down for you. Our girl Lisa:
- drove 900 miles from Houston to Orlando,
- wore adult diapers in the car so she wouldn’t have to make any pit stops,
- donned a disguise that enabled her to approach the other woman in an airport parking lot,
- knocked on the woman’s car window,
- and pepper sprayed the bitch when she rolled the window down.
Am I the only one here who thinks Lisa Nowak is…kind of awesome?
I mean, when she finds out that some two-penny ho is messing with her man, she doesn’t sit at home and cry about it – she slaps on a pair of fucking ADULT DIAPERS and BRINGS IT. It’s NASA meets Maury Povich, and I fucking love it.
“You better not be sleepin’ with my baby-daddy, you weightless bitch! Now get yo’ skank ass to the cockpit and propagate our orbiter state vector.“
Man, love is a bitch, isn’t it Lisa? I mean, you can fly a damn shuttle into outer space, but you can’t control how love turns this:
And makes this:
degenerate into this:
Shall I compare thee to an absorbent panel?
Entry filed under: Gobble-gobble.