December 6, 2007 at 1:32 pm 2 comments

That’s the sound of a goddamn housefly slamming his gross little body against my bedroom window at 6:00 in the morning.

Seriously, what the fuck? It’s December. It’s snowing. It’s twelve goddamn degrees outside. What the hell is a fly doing in my house?

The weird thing is, the fly has woken me up with his little self-flagellation routine on several non-consecutive mornings – and every time I jump out of bed and try to hunt down the little fucker, he becomes totally silent. And is nowhere to be found.

I have drawn two possible conclusions:

  1. I am crazy
  2. Jeff Goldblum is trying to stay in my house rent-free for the winter.


Good morning, sunshine!


Entry filed under: Gobble-gobble.

No Means No: The Newest Most-Disturbing Christmas Carol When You Read A Book, Baby Jesus Cries

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Husband of Said Turkey  |  December 6, 2007 at 10:59 pm

    Oh, Brundle-Fly. You are soooo pretty.

  • 2. Chicago Friend of Said Turkey  |  December 10, 2007 at 6:59 pm

    God knows Jeff Goldblum could use a break.


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