Dear Coworker…

January 12, 2009 at 12:06 pm 7 comments

cough2Love, Jive Turkey

[Alternate post titles include: “Get Some Fucking Coughdrops Already,” and “How About Shutting Your Fucking Door So I Don’t Have to Listen to Your Best Impression of a Victorian-Era Tuberculosis Ward?”]

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Entry filed under: Taste my Backhand.

What – No Mint On The Pillow? The Ordinary and the Extraordinary

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. kristin  |  January 13, 2009 at 9:03 am

    Maybe you could do a run-by coughdropping. You know, race by her door so fast you’re just a blur and hurl a bag of Ricola in there before she sees who it is. That would be pretty damn funny.

    Reply
  • 2. Sara  |  January 13, 2009 at 12:04 pm

    I hope she’s washing her hands often. I am constantly washing my hands. But I’m also a germaphobe, so there you go. I have hand sanitizer in my desk (in a delightful vanilla scent that you can almost smell over the alcohol!) to use after I cough or use a tissue (which is often, since I’m allergic to work).

    By the way, JT, please read the comments on my last blog post; my brother-in-law gave you a shout out, and he’s sad that you haven’t read it (or maybe you have and haven’t responded; either way, he’s sad).

    Reply
  • 3. 4th Reader of Said Turkey  |  January 13, 2009 at 12:40 pm

    One of the only good things about being laid off is not having to deal with annoying co-workers.

    Reply
  • 4. Carrie  |  January 13, 2009 at 12:49 pm

    Maybe you should start calling them a “lunger” or “thyphoid Mary” or something? I feel for you. Listening to people cough grosses me out. Especially if it sounds at all phlegmy.

    Reply
  • 5. Gaby  |  January 15, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    I just came here via Leah’s (agirlandaboy) site, and this entry made me crack up. I, too, have a co-worker who would rather hack and wheeze all day than stay home. And ho boy, what a joy it was to listen to him recover from having ridden his bike into work one morning…a 5-mile ride. I think he stopped hacking around 3 p.m.

    Oh, and I can hear him chewing.

    Co-workers. Ugh. Thanks for the laugh.

    Reply
  • 6. MLE  |  January 15, 2009 at 5:51 pm

    re: your bird/plane comment:

    I KNOW, right? I’m just glad this wasn’t OUR plane. I need a swim in the Hudson this time of year like I need a hole in my head.

    Reply
  • 7. Sarah S.  |  January 19, 2009 at 6:30 pm

    um, do you think it would be inappropriate to give these cards out to my sick students….I am thinking it would probably involve a serious discussion from my principal….but how funny would it be to hand them out…..I definitely already think these things anyway…

    Reply

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